Sent in by alert reader and R’wood member-in-exile, Kenny Gilbert.
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Sometimes, you read something in the news that is so stupid, so insipid, so completely and utterly ridiculous, that you wonder whether you’ve stumbled onto the Onion, or some such. Although, when I tell you that this story involves the intersection of the Church of England, Global Warming, and Lent, perhaps it will seem less like parody.
Two bishops in the Church of England are suggesting that people fast from carbon for the next 40 days. Read it here. Quoth Bishop of Liverpool James Jones:
For example, on the first day, people can take out one of their light bulbs and whenever they go to turn that light on, and it doesnÂt work, they can remember why they are fasting from carbon — to help the poor of the world. At the end of the fast they can replace it with an energy-saving light bulb.
How does anyone’s stumbling around in the dark help the poor of the world? What absolute nonsense. No wonder the pews are empty in the CoE.
HT: Captain’s Quarters.
Please, please do not buy me any Christian merchandise. Depressing story here. Why is the target demographic middle-aged moms? (No offense to middle-age moms; it just seems to be a rather monochromatic approach.) Does this depict American Christianity? Ok, maybe I’ll just give in. You can buy me the bull-riding Jesus.
I feel like Dave Barry, when I say, “I’m not making this up.” Someone saw this church sign here in Tuscloosa, alerted me, and then sent me the photos. Here it is in all its glory:
I even feel I’m being too nice by pixelating the church name and the pastor’s name. This is excrement. This is anti-scriptural, anti-gospel, and anti-work-of-Christ…..and impossible. I told somebody that vulgarity spray-painted on a brick wall would have been less destructive than this nonsense. I will go take 10 deep breaths, now.
“For it is by grace you have been saved— through faith, and even your faith is not of yourselves— it is the gift of God, so that no one should boast.” Ephesians 2:8,9
Last week Sen. Chuck Grassley from Iowa launched a Senate Panel investigation into 6 televangelists. It turns out that Creflo Dollar’s church bought him a Rolls Royce. (Article here.) To the Riverwood faithful: I like the color charcoal.
Just as I was in the process of writing a Salt and Light article about chocolate Easter crosses and such, I ran across this. Now the chocolate crosses at the local grocery seem tame. Check it out…or maybe you’d rather not.http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070330/aponreus/chocolatejesus;ylt=AqAtm8WP.pAx8GGJHdDaNGs0NUE
I ran across these “Christian” spoofs of the I’m a Mac / I’m a PC ads.
Go see it for yourself… and weep at the sorry state of Christendom.
They’re here.
Words fail me.
Life’s been pretty hectic around our house the last few weeks since my mom had a fall, so I was enjoying just staying in this morning, drinking my coffee and staring at our Christmas tree. I began to peruse some catalogues for Christmas crafts to use for the covenant kids’ Christmas and Craft day. The following items kind of soured my Christmasy mood. Just HAD TO SHARE and confirm what you already know about modern Christian gullibilities and sensitivites. Do they really have purchasers for these? 1. A coffee mug that reminds you, “God loves you a latte.” 2. a snowman ornament proclaiming “Jesus loves you snow much!” 3. a “plush stuffed bears nativity scene ” (I.e. little stuffed bears dressed like Joseph,Mary,baby Jesus bear, etc. 4. a vinyl nativity rubber duckies scene (same as above but little yellow bath ducks dressed as wise men, Jesus, Joseph, sheperds, etc.) 5. Little packages of gummy reindeer proclaiming “Jesus is deer to me.” (get it?) 6. And, of course, several varieties of cross-shaped Christmas lollipops in…peppermint, etc.)
Well, I could go on. These are only a sampling. Cha-ching! Cha-ching! What suckers we evangelicals are!
Recently, someone sent me this link: http://www.sermonspice.com/listings/2/sermon-illustrations/
Basically, it’s an online version of a sermon illustration book—the bane of all diligent ministers. It has “powerful illustrations” indexed by topic and user rated for its heart-rending effectiveness. Once the perfect illustration, video, or movie is discovered, you simply add it to your virtual cart. Prices range from $15 to $89 (from what I perused).
There are many things wrong with this approach, but I will only highlight several
1) It prevents the minister from properly dividing the Word of Truth.
Instead or reading the Greek, Hebrew, commentaries, and other fine literature, I can just “click to download.” It doesn’t promote labor, good thinking, or habitual discipline.
2) Sermons are reduced to ear-candy
Sermons begin to be rated by their interesting stories, not by their truth-laden content.
3) Promotes sensationalism and emotionalism (read: manipulative)
User-rated responses highlighted the illustrations that evoked the most powerful emotive response. (Yes, illustrations can be emotional, but that cannot be their primary attribute for selection)
4) Promotes moralism through topicality
Since these illustrations are not tied to specific texts under examination, it easily leads to superficial, topical fluff, that is devoid of a broader (redemptive-historical) and specific (textual) contextual considerations.
5) A steady diet of fiction leads to sentimentality
Akin to email forwards that relay an emotional and/or fictional story, this leads well-meaning Christians down a road of the “unreal and fantastical.” Our faith should always be grounded in reality. Justification in the midst of the grit and pain of reality. It reminds me of the well-intended WWJD fad—based on a completely fictional book that “transformed an entire town” because they uttered, “What would Jesus do?” before every action.
Please comment on this site’s validity and worthwhile nature, because I might have written this during an excitable state of mind.
I know, I know. Another post about a church sign. But the whole phenomenon both facinates and disgusts me at the same time. What is it about giving a church a signboard that impels them to put something irretreivably stupid on it?
Passing by a church on my way back home from vacation, we saw a sign that read:
“Salvation is a Gift from God - Assembly Required.”
Last week I posted on how often the church uses mass marketing tactics rather than eloquent persuasion. Does this not prove the point? Not only does it seem to contradict its own message, but its lame attempt at humor only reminds me of those toys that I’ve bought for my kids that have to be put together while they cry impatiently. Not exactly the kind of image I’d want to bring to mind.
Worse, though, is the contradiction. It starts out sounding like grace, but finishes up sounding more like something with strings attached. Which is it? Do you get salvation, full and free, or is there a requirement that you show up to church a few times to make God like you better before it’s complete? And if that’s not the type of “assembly” they mean, then that’s even worse.
I don’t want anyone to think that I’m discounting the importance of regular attendance at church for believers. That’s not what the sign I saw talked about, though. It’s expressly referring to salvation.
I guess I’m just glad I don’t get gifts from these guys.
Well, it has been a long time since I’ve had the chance to sit down and put up a post. However, this week, that should change. I’m at the beach this week, and will hopefully have the time to do some things that I really enjoy, and blogging has turned out to be one of those.
So, to start the week off, here’s the view from my balcony at sunset this evening:
Anytime you travel any distance, you can’t help but run across a couple of church signs of the type that Bryan Bond was so fond of, er, critiquing. We passed by a large community-type church this morning. Later in the day, we saw a billboard for this church that had its name and slogan. I’ll withhold the church’s name, but the slogan was “Bringing good people together.”
Ordinarily, it would be easy enough from our reformed perspective to ridicule this, and normally that’s what this post would be about. However, I’ve started reading a book that has given me a bit of perspective about why the slogan is so bad.
The Board at Riverwood Classical School (on which I am honored to sit) is currently reading a book entitled Widsom and Eloquence. The authors’ thesis, borrowing from Augustine, is that to truly make a difference in a disbelieving world, Christians must be not only wise, but also be eloquent, so as to enable them to persuasively communicate their wisdom to that world.
Now, consider the church’s slogan, “Bringing Good People Together,” in this light. Is it wisdom communicated eloquently? Perhaps that’s too much to ask from a billboard (which begs the question of using such a thing anyway), but, leaving that aside, I assert that this is neither wise nor eloquent.
It’s not wise in that it’s contrary to the plain teaching of scripture:
As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands, no one who seeks God. All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one.”
Romans 3:10-12. Also, I’d argue that it’s not particuarly eloquent. What fraternity, sorrority, country club, alumni association, or any number of other social organizations wouldn’t say the same thing? What if you don’t happen to feel like all that great a person? Should you pass this place by? It may qualify as catchy in a mass-communications sense, but that’s not the same as eloquence. I fear that the church has bought into earthly advertising ideas as a replacement for true communication and persuasion.
I’m sure that some will read this post and think that it’s not particuarly brimming with wisdom or eloquence, and maybe that person is right. However, as an aspirational standard for Christians, I think it’s spot-on.
Gene Veith’s blog is one I enjoy reading regularly. He was with World Magazine until he recently took a position with Patrick Henry College. Today he referenced an article about Christian theme parks. I really can’t do it justice. Here’s the link. … and yes, there really was a Golgotha Fun park miniature golf course in Cave City,KY, it’s currently for sale….
I also found several other articles available online about the Holy Land Experience Park in Orlando. Just Google ‘Christian theme parks’. Be sure your stomach is settled before you hit enter.
I think this is the first advertisement to be submitted for Christian Chaff:
Apparently a British group called Churches’ Advertising Network will place this ad with a caption reading “Where will you find him?” Their stated intention is to spark discussion about where people find God.
This has ticked off the anti-drinking advocates, who say it will undermine anti-binge drinking campaigns. What exactly about this image is supposed to incline folks to funnel beer is not exactly clear to me.
However, I am at a loss to understand how this furthers the gospel. Does this mean that you can find Jesus in your beer glass, or not? From what the group says, I think they mean no, but, just to look at the ad and the slogan, it’s by no means clear.
It really brought to mind Tim’s sermon from last week about how Christians should desire excellence and discernment. Without getting into the relative merits and demerits of mass media advertising for Jesus, I think it’s pretty clear that this is not even excellent advertising, because its message is so confusing. What’s the non-believer supposed to take away from this? Is he or she supposed to see the face in the foam and miraculously convert? Or is the non-believer to be shamed for drinking a beer?
Either way, I call this chaff.
After some discussions from a bunch of “non-commenters,” I think it would probably be helpful if I offered some real affirmation and proper critique of the “Christian” products that I doom to carry the label of “Christian Chaff.” (And, no, these products will not eventually begin to carry a proud dignity ala Hester Prynne’s prominent ‘A.’) Sometimes their weaknesses seem so garish, blatant, and self-evident, that I don’t think it needs my added derision. But I don’t think that serves anyone to fully, critically, tactfully, carefully, and responsibly interact with their environs. (Yes, that was a continuous string of 5 adverbs)
These t-shirts were found online here. However, full credit goes to Miss Prathima Ryali-Hancock for discovering the site. Although not shown below, she had a particular bewilderment at the entire “Jesus Is My Homeboy” line of t-shirts and accessories.
Now, after you chuckle with Reformed Disdain— look, again. We have to take these examples seriously, because there are fellow brothers and sisters in Christ who, indeed, wear these shirts. An unbelieving world rarely can make the proper distinctions between denominations, or between fanaticism and orthodox belief. Whether we like it or not, we are lumped together in a giant ball of doughy Christianity. Consequently, I think it is proper and important for there to be continual examination and reformation within the Church, by the Church, regardless of denominational affiliation.
First, I would like to point out the praise-worthy aspects of these shirts. It is tempting to assume that the makers of these shirts, primarily, have monetary gain as their motivation. However, I think that this would be a dangerous and inappropriate leap. I think many of these Christian Chaff products stem from sweet and sincere motivations. Note Exhibit A: Patriotism is not altogether bad; neither is exuberance at proclaiming that “Jesus Saves!” Taken separately, I don’t mind either sentiment. Note Exhibit B: There seems to be a desire to pattern our lives after preceding saints, coupled with a plea/exhortation to stick with it when the going gets rocky (pun intended). Those are excellent messages. Note Exhibit C: Truly, Christ is the King of Kings—a proclamation that will find its fruition when “every knee will bow and every tongue confess” those very words. Note: Exhibit D: I think part of the designer’s motivations included a real urgency for people to a) know the reality of a much larger spiritual realm, and b) realize that all people will be called into account for their belief. In isolation, all of these messages are great. However, there is more work to be done.
Although motivations and intentions can be sweet and sincere, the final result of an action or product must also stand alone in its ability to be assessed. And that makes this stuff Christian Chaff.
Exhibit A: This t-shirt is the most appalling to me. Popular evangelicalism has confused patriotism with the Gospel. When Scripture paints a picture of heaven with “all tribes and nations,” I hardly think that the Stars and Stripes will be waving behind the seraphim. In juxtaposition, it would seem that God has blessed the good ole U.S. of A with divine right, and a monopoly on true religion.
Exhibit B: Ask yourself, “Who is the intended audience for this shirt?” If it is intended for believers (evidenced by “stand your ground”), then the edgy statement “Get Stoned” is unnecessary and inappropriate. Is this the proper venue to deliver encouragement and exhortation to a fellow struggler? Surely, there are better ways. In the same way, if the shirt is targeted towards unbelievers, then it has truly little or no meaning without defining context. Misperception will be imminent if there is no shared understanding of the biblical story.
Exhibit C: Parody, imitation, and satire are all tools that have dramatic rhetoric value while, simultaneously, being humorous. However, imitation shows a great lack of creativity if it is unable to highlight something beyond the original meaning. In other words, the t-shirt logo fails to emphasize anything profound or extraordinary. Principally, it is pronouncing, “The King of Kings is just as amazing as the King of the Whoppers.” And, sadly, that’s not saying much.
Exhibit D: If I were to read this t-shirt, I can’t imagine that my heart would be suddenly turned to repentant mush. I liken this t-shirt to the “Hell Houses” that are so prominent in October. If that is the Gospel message, then I want no part of it.
As the title suggests, I believe we might just be more effective if we didn’t wear any Christian t-shirts. I have no evidence to support this following statement, so take it with a grain of salt, but: I sincerely believe that Christian t-shirts have done more to detract from the Gospel than to promote it.
Today’s Christian Chaff (formerly known as Christian Cr@p) comes from the purveyors of all things tacky and tasteless. The company, Kerusso (© 2006, All Rights Reserved, ®, etc….), is aptly named. “Kerusso” is the English phonetic equivalent of ‘κηρύσσω’—the first-century Greek word that means “to loudly proclaim some good stuff.” It is often used in the NT as “to preach [the Gospel].” And, boy, oh, boy, this company loudly proclaims.
However, I didn’t come across their website until one of our college students handed me a poker chip that felt and weighed….yes, just like the real thing. After my Vegas flashbacks subsided, I began to wonder if I could actually slip this chip into my pile, when I get short-stacked down at Wilhagen’s. But seriously, take a look at the front and reverse of this circular piece of “evangelism.”
Adding words might actually be anti-climactic, so I will limit my observations. Something to ponder: should I now refer to death as, “Cashing in your chips?”
On a recent vacation trip to Atlanta and South Carolina, I decided that there must be a religious revival taking place among Southern young people, or at least, what passes for Christianity amidst the teen set. Everywhere we went; Stone Mountain, the Carolina Aquarium, Six Flags, and even individuals in the streets, there were groups and groups of young people wearing identical tee shirts with Christian “messages” enjoying the sights. Some of the shirts simply had the church name on them and were probably helpful in keeping the group together in crowds. Others added some catchy name for the group, i.e. Teen Mission ‘06. Still others teetered on the outside edge of taste. Finally, some of the groups were, in my opinion, downright detrimental to the cause of Christ.
Many of the shirts had variations of ad slogans. As an example, one of the most obnoxious used the Dairy Association slogan, “Got Milk?” except this was changed to “Got Jesus?” I guess the “message” was: If you haven’t got Jesus, you need to run by your local Pak-A-Sak and get him. He’s there on the shelf and he’s good for you! There were others almost as bad and many were in very garish neon colors that screamed “Look at me!”
The “look at me” idea is a constant for these displays. This was demonstrated most vividly in an episode I’ll call “The Stone Mountain Choir.” We had climbed Stone Mountain; my daughter, myself and my grandchildren. It was late in the afternoon (I’m old and slow) so we decided to ride the trams down. Because it was the last trips available, the building was packed with people waiting in line. Immediately ahead of us was one of these church groups, actually one of the larger ones we saw, maybe forty kids. Their shirts had a Bible passage on the back that was so long and the lettering so small that it couldn’t be read unless you were less than ten feet away and had some time available. When they saw that they had a large captive audience, they broke into a very “cheesy” (to use the new vernacular) praise song, and they sang it for many verses. What was fascinating was to watch the faces of the kids involved and the people forced to listen.
Most of those forced to stand there and listen looked pained. Some of the kids were obviously proud, staring out at everyone with almost a “I dare you to complain” look, indicating that they were Proud to be working for the Lord.Others, especially one particular guy, stood there with a beatific smile, proud to be joyous and holy. After seven or eight verses, it finally died down as some, then finally all, tired of it.
I’ve asked myself if I over-reacted to this stuff. After reflection, I really don’t think so. I’m almost certain that no one ever decided that they needed to find out more about Christ from a tee shirt or other over the top dress, bumper sticker, etc. I am fairly certain that people are usually turned off by these things, and this was quite plain as I surveyed the faces of the listerners to the Stone Mountain Choir. I could normally care less about this silliness but it does bother me that the name of the Lord is used, and I do mean used in its worse sense, so casually, so crassly and with such obvious self satisfaction and self exaltation.
For the past 9 or 10 years, I have been collecting novelties and trinkets that I have found mostly in Christian bookstores. These items have earned themselves the title: “Christian Crap.” These useless, cheap parodies of our secular culture have provided me with hours of sad, sad entertainment. If they are to be taken seriously, they are no less horrible than the indulgences of the 16th century.
But woefully, my Big Box O’ Crap has run out of space. And due to my new position as head pastor, people will grimace at my usage of the aforementioned synonym for excrement. So I have retooled the moniker and have come up with “Christian Chaff.” Yay, it even sounds more biblical.
All that to say, I hope to begin to build a virtual museum of some of the truly bad examples of the Christian sub-culture. If you come across a particularly bad/good example, please email me swiftly. You may even want to apply the Tri-Test:
• Does the item simply copy pop-culture, thereby lacking original creativity?
• Does the item take a bible verse out of context, or is it blatantly heretical/blasphemous?
• And finally, would you personally, use it, wear it, display it, or derive true spiritual encouragement from said object? If not, you have a winner.
Today’s Christian Chaff comes to us from Shoes of the Fisherman (SotF). SotF sells a line of Beach Sandals that leave an imprint on the sand that says, “Jesus Loves You.”
