Faith and Science
I’m Glad That’s Settled
by Clay Staggs
So, I’m going about my ordinary day, doing my work, and while on the net found a link that said this:
“Parallel Universes Exist - Study”
Intrigued, I clicked through and found this article.
Now, I am surely not a mathematician or physicist, but this seems a bit much. These “Oxford scientists” have proved - on paper - that alternative universes exist? That, in fact, for every possibility in the physical world, the universe splits, one universe pursuing each possibility, and leaving us with an infinite number of universes?
I just want to know one thing, then. How do I get to the universe where Clay Staggs leads a life of leisure on the beach, instead of getting up and schlepping to work every day?
Wait a minute! If there are infinite universes where every alternative happens, how do I know I’m not really supposed to be in that Clay-on-the-beach universe instead of this one, and have just been abducted to this one by the alternate universe Clay, who is, even as I type this, on my alternate universe beach drinking my alternate universe beer?
Hmmm…..
Posted by Clay Staggs at October 1, 2007 04:07 PM
Clay, Clay, Clay. You can’t reach the alternate universe without dilithium crystals. Or a wardrobe made out of the wood of the Tree of Life. So, you must accept your state and realize that you, as the possible alternate-reality Clay, cannot reach the infinite alternate realities that are apparently now proven by the Oxford scientists and just move on.
Yes, I’ve already tried.
Yet another path of despair….
I can’t reach the greener grass of an alternate universe, no matter how hard I try.
I would be concerned that if I got a transfer pass to another universe, I’d wind up on the wrong line and go to the universe with me being the tyrant, murderer, or deviant rather than the saint or prodigy or beachcomber, or whatever.
Very cool, though, that (although not simultaneous) we do have an eternal reality awaiting us and the ‘dilithium crystals’ we had to have to get there were replaced by the cross of Christ.
If you figure it out, clue us in. I can think of some alternative realities I wouldn’t mind being in a bit more often, too. Better yet, once you have it down,you could hold seminars and let everyone in on the secret, for a price. That could create even more alternatives.